is not just another book about sex.

When my friends talked about their lovers, I could see how intoxicated they were by being wanted in a bodice-ripper, can’t-wait-another-second way. I finally had to admit that I wanted that, too.
— from Shameless

Behind the Book

Maybe it’s a congenital disorder. Maybe it’s something I learned as an itty-bitty baby. But when I find something wonderful or liberating or even mildly helpful, I can’t keep my mouth shut. Even my mother, the original unfiltered talker, marvels at my compulsion to spill the beans whenever I’m on a mission.

When I was 42, I took a pretty zany voyage from an honest-to-goodness repressed, monogamous, middle-aged, hyper-achieving, chubby woman with two kids to an honest-to-goodness monogamish, middle-aged, accomplished chubby “sex goddess” with two kids.

Once I owned up to my deepest, untapped desires, I discovered a wellspring of happiness and self-confidence inside me that extended to every part of my life. Whoa! I thought. This is incredible! Everyone should know they have the power to experience life in all its richness right now, just as they are. No diets, no plastic surgery, no nothing. Just intact, healthy sexuality.

If I can stop warring with my weight and workaholism, I think most people can. I know that when I stopped denying my hearty and normal sexual appetites, I started losing my uncontrollable urges to overeat, overwork and over-compensate. For the first time, I could relax in my own skin.

Admitting your desires takes a tanker-load of courage, and a rip-stop web of support. That’s what I’m here to provide. That’s my mission. That’s why I wrote SHAMELESS.

Even if it was a bit outside the box for an internationally known and respected advocate in the world of fertility, I believed it is essential to speak up about healthy sexuality....and so I did.

With few nonprofessional people willing to speak openly about the power of sensuality, the average sexually curious person is stuck with dry textbooks or fictional characters that they can enjoy but can’t emulate. I ain’t no Cougar Town Courtney Cox. Most men I know aren’t starring in that canceled series on HBO, Hung. But it doesn’t mean we can’t feel as sexy. And when we feel that sexy, that good about ourselves, when we feel we deserve pleasure, and lots of it, that’s when so many things that seemed impossible can become our new reality. As Dr. Christiane Northrup so succinctly put it, “Pleasure is a life-changer.”

Who better to write a tell-all about allowing pleasure to change your life than a woman who lived it and can’t keep a secret? Yeah, I know. I’m shameless.

Shameless is enthralling, hilarious and incredibly courageous. A most heady—and sexy combination. Pamela Madsen is the living, breathing embodiment of the power of pleasure to transform one’s life.
— Christiane Northrup, M.D., author or Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom
I love this book as an adult book-group choice because it addresses so many issues familiar to women in our community’s book groups: sex, marriage, motherhood, aging, weight, body image, identity, shame, fear, courage, risk.
— / Shelftalker
If you’ve ever dreamt of becoming a real live sex Goddess Pamela Madsen will show you the way; with grace, integrity and joyful abandon! “Find true pleasure” with this liberating book chock full of adventures from the heart. This is the first of a whole new genre in sex education books.
— Annie Sprinkle, Ph.D., Ecosexual Sexecologist and Artist and author of Dr. Sprinkle's Spectacular Sex
The edgy quirkiness of the story, combined with the author’s honesty and character-saving ability to laugh at herself, make the book an engaging read...bold and surprisingly moving.
— Kirkus Reviews
Shameless sex goddess Pamela Madsen treats us to an astonishing memoir of one woman’s journey into her precious inner wildness. This brave suburban wife and mother unveils the secrets of an unbelievably expanded sexuality in which desire becomes a virtue, and sexual greed opens the gates to spiritual ecstasy and orgasmic revelations.
— Dossie Easton, co-author of The Ethical Slut and Radical Ecstasy
Pamela Madsen’s new book about healthy sexuality, Shameless, reminds you to tell the truth about yourself, embrace the most challenging topics, surround yourself with supportive friends and family, and celebrate your inner diva.
— Wayne C. Shields, President and CEO, Association of Reproductive Health Professionals (ARHP)