"Hysteria"

Learning To Trust Your Own Vagina

I am deep in the world of vaginas.  I am watching "Hysteria", reading Naomi Wolf's new book, "Vagina: New A Biography", and busy planning the details for"Back to The Body: A Sensuous Retreat For Women". I went to sleep literally holding mine in my hand, and lulling myself to sleep. My vagina gives me comfort, pleasure, and is literally the biggest tool in my tool chest for my own continued transformation. I want that for all women.

It makes me so sad that many women don't trust their own vaginas. We have so much fear about them, and create a world of Grimm Fairy tales around them.  We worry that we smell funny. That we won't orgasm, or lubricate enough, or that our vulva is funny looking. We worry that our vagina will take too long to give us pleasure and that our lovers will get bored or tired.
Most of the healing and relationship building I have done with my own vagina has been through vulva massage and through talking about vaginas in the company of other women. Most heterosexual women have never seen another woman's vulva. We have no idea of the different shapes, colors and textures. Many men know more about vaginas than women because they actually get to see them, and touch them.
Most women are left alone, in isolation with our vagina for our entire life. We don't even have words we are comfortable with to name our vagina, and way too many women cannot name the landscape of their own vulva. Let's face it. Nobody talks about their own vagina. Women talk tons about their relationships with men, but when was the last time (if you own a vagina) that you talked about your vagina?
I believe that women need way more touch on their vaginas then they are currently getting. I am not necessarily talking about love making. I am talking about vulva,clitoral, vaginal and g spot massage. Women can learn to do this for themselves, and it is absolutely awakening to us, to simply be able to lie back and receive this. It can bring you into a place of transcendence. It will open you up to parts of yourself that you didn't know existed. Emotional weather will come in like a tornado, and leave you in sunshine. You may cry, scream or laugh. You may have an orgasm, or you may not. The more you receive genital massage the deeper you will go. You will wake up in ways you cannot even imagine. And once you wake up your vagina - you will touch your own beloved, and she will never leave you. You might even lull yourself to sleep, gently holding her.
The feminine spirit lives there, and we need to teach women how to access it. Why don't we teach girls about vaginas and the emotional powerhouse that is stored in them? That is the endless question, that there are way too many answers too. But we can take control now, and teach ourselves. It is never too late to access the power of your own vagina and learn to trust her. One tool, might be to listen to "Self, Love and Sexuality" my meditation created to take you inside your own vagina.
Your vagina is beautiful, desirable, and can help you release the creative potential that you hold inside of yourself.  If you want help in your explorations, please reach out.
Loving you from here,

Pamela